Cinema Etiquette: Part III

In April 2014 I wrote a couple of blog entries about cinema-going etiquette - mainly because a couple of cinema outings had pissed me off so much I had to rant about it. One of those was actually in Captain America: The Winter Soldier. And guess what - another episode that got my blood boiling, which just so happen to be in a session for Captain America: Civil War. Coincidence? Probably. Let me lay this out for you.

I'm pumped beyond belief for CA:CW this morning. So excited I get nervous, anxious and anything else you could use to describe it. Before heading out to the film, I'm making sure I don't drink too much, I've cleared the bowels too many times through nervous shits. I know, you're thinking - "Who the fuck is this guy?". You know what, I don't know who or what I am, but I ain't this low life I'm about to rant about below.

Anyways, these days I like to book Gold Class, premium seating sessions for the big big films. Because I am sick to death of cunt faces in cinemas just ruining my experience. I like to think I have a fair amount of tolerance for the shit heads in life, but, I do think there is a time and place for everything as well. In my holy place (yeah, that is a cinema, not a church), I like quiet and no mobile phone usage during the film. 

However, I am tolerant of a little bit of both. People make occasional comments to their peers in films - you know what, I do too. Not full on fucken conversations, but a little whisper in the ear. I can also accept that someone may take a quick glance at their phones during a film. Checking the time, waiting for an important call or emergency text - I get it, we need to do this shit sometime. 

What I don't get, is the fucken shit bag that has paid minimum $40 to sit in Captain America: Civil War and play a video game/gambling game on his mobile as the film is starting and at least 5 mins into it. Not just starting credits (of which I don't think there was any), but during the opening action sequence. 

The lights go out, the film starts. I'm loving my seat, but in the seat which was in the row in front and to the right I could see this scum bag piece of shit a playing game! A fucken game! He is looking at his phone and looking up at the screen every now and then. Me, I'm trying to get immersed into the film, but I can't. His phone is distracting the shit out of me. I sit there in hope that he'll finish his fucking level or whatever and put that away. My blood is literally hitting boiling point - you are ruining my time in this holy place motherfucker. 

So, I get up and go over to him. Tap him on the shoulder, and ask him nicely to turn off his phone screen. Now, I ain't a big guy. I got a big temper, but I have been balanced out with a skinny physique and fighting skills that are non-existant.  So, when I say I asked politely, I did. It is firm, but not rude. Look at me, I'm worried about being rude to the cock head using his phone in the movie. Weird right? You know what he says back? I say "Can you please turn off your phone screen?"...he says, "Why?"...what in the hell is this shit brick thinking? "Why?" Seriously? I then said "Because you are in my line of sight and it is distracting me. So, do you mind? Do you mind?" Yep, I said "Do you mind?" twice. He honestly looked like I had asked if I could shoot a load into his wife's face. Sorry if that is derogatory, but damn, it was like I had done something very very wrong by asking him to actually watch the fucking film. Shame on me right. 

I go back to my seat. He adjusts his seat a bit more upright, no doubt so he could continue to use his phone without me seeing it. What a schlub. He eventually did put it in his pocket. I followed this guy out just to get a look at him. I wasn't going to do anything. I considered making a quick jibe after the movie about being able to play your game now. But, my wife was pretty much telling me to chill. 

Just after I told him to turn the screen off and then sat down, it took me about 10 mins to completely relax again. Sure, I got boiling blood from something so simple, but why is it, in this day and age, people must be so fucking dumb about their activities in shared spaces? This was not a free movie in the park, this was paid event where people are generally there to enjoy themselves, and pay complete attention to the film unfolding. I still can't get over the fact his first response was to ask "Why?"...Good luck with life! (that goes for me as well)

Review: Captain America: Civil War (2016)

On March 13th 2016, I embarked on a full re-watch of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) films - finishing up with Ant-Man last night. Today I went to my Gold Class session of Captain America: Civil War. I booked this ticket as soon as they went on sale. The level of anticipation and excitement has been feverishly building for a long long time. It all culminated this morning. 

After all of the films revisited and ranked, I suppose the one thing I was pretty sure of going in was that I was going to love it. In fact, it was probably near on impossible for me to not love it. So, guess what happened - the impossible did not happen. I loved it - review over. 

No, just kidding. I got few more things to say. Anthony and Joe Russo delivered in 2014 what I consider to be the best MCU entry - Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Well, I did have that belief up until now. Now, I am not so sure. Some of you may be wondering about The Avengers film - well, I love that too, and sometimes struggle with which one out of that and Winter Soldier I love more. It is a first world problem - that struggle. 

The team behind this film take the great aspects of Winter Soldier and amp it up a few more notches. That is - great story telling and exciting action set pieces. Couple those two with very very good scripting and character interaction, and it is difficult to even walk away from this film without enjoying it. Whether you think it is the best or not, well, we can debate that shit till the end of time. Hell, I might not even debate it - I'd just agree. 

The story - it seems simple on the surface. Steve Rogers and Tony Stark don't agree with each other, so they fight about it. It really wasn't a simple one though. There are a lot of layers to the story. That is what I really enjoyed about Winter Soldier, and they've pulled off another deeply engaging film with real emotional weight to it. What really surprised me though was how difficult it was to pick a side. The character arcs and their reasons for opposing each other were very well done. I don't want to go too much into it - because I like to write reviews that are generally non-spoiler material. I walked away from this film probably leaning towards Team Cap, but, it was not an easy decision - I still love Iron Man. 

The action - like Winter Soldier, it feels more tangible. Is that the right word? Hmmm. Although we're dealing with superheroes, it just feels more grounded. In particular, the fighting feels like a souped up Jason Bourne film. You feel those hits. The overall explosions and shit like that seemed a bit more restrained in this film as well. It is definitely about the conflict and the character's struggle. Don't get me wrong, there is some great great set pieces, but, it is very different to The Avengers and Age of Ultron - hell, even quite different in some ways to Winter Soldier. Once you watch, or if you have, I hope you see what I mean. If not, then what the fuck aye!

Ok, what else is there. Cool story, cool action. Characters - we've got our favourites here, plus another couple added to the mix. Black Panther is introduced well - so well,  I am quite excited to see more of him. I believe he has a solo film coming up, so I'm keen to see more exploration of his character and origin. The big one people are talking about is Spider-Boy...yep, he is an actual teenage boy this time. No, he is not actually called Spider-Boy, he is still Spider-Man. Very different to the interpretations we've seen so far - well, just younger and less mature I suppose. He's got a solo adventure coming next year. I'm looking forward to seeing more of Aunt May as well ;-) 

All up, we've got another great entry in the MCU. Not all have been great though. In fact, I reckon 7 out of 13 are great films - but the rest a pretty damned good as well. This one sits near the top - if not on top. I need another viewing. I'll give it a few weeks I think. After so many superhero films in the last 6 weeks, with a lot more actually watched in the last 2 or 3 weeks, I actually could be experiencing superhero fatigue. Don't worry about me though, it is a good kind of fatigue. 

4.5/5

Review: The Jungle Book (2016)

Visually one of the most outstanding films you will ever see. I believe almost everything except Mowgli himself is computer generated. The technology behind photo-realistic animals and nature has come very very far since the days of Aslan and Avatar - and that wasn't all that long ago.

I'm not overly familiar with the original story, so I couldn't tell you how true it stays to the source. Basically, Mowgli is a boy (man-cub) raised by Wolves. He comes under the threat of Shere Khan, the great Tiger in the jungle. He decides to leave the jungle to protect his Wolf family - and so begins his journey of survival. Along the way, he meets characters (animals) that will either be his friend or foe.

As you would have guessed, the only human in this film is Mowgli. He is played very well by young Neel Sethi. Most of the animals speak, and it is quite fun hearing the voices of popular actors playing some of the animals of the jungle. I won't say who they are, as it is cool to guess if you don't know already.

The film itself is fun, exciting, adventure-filled and as mentioned before, just amazing to look at. The tone itself can be quite dark and occasionally tense, but there is plenty of playfulness and cute animals to balance it out.

4/5

Review: Midnight Special (2016)

A week after seeing some tweets about how great Midnight Special is, I found myself winning a double pass to a preview/premiere screening here in Perth. I was quite excited to see what people are raving on about. I've seen the Director's (Jeff Nichols) previous films (Take Shelter and Mud), of which I thought Shelter was the better of the two - but Mud is pretty good too. 

They both took their time to explore the characters and relay the story - sometimes to the point of being a bit too slow for me. But, they came full circle and finish very well. This one is no different in that respect, but I found the central plot quite intriguing and more interesting than the others (at least more so than Mud).

Michael Shannon and Joel Edgerton are on the run, accused of abducting a child. That child is actually the son of Shannon's character - a boy with strange abilities. There is a lot of mystery that surrounds the events in this film. Things unfold, but at a pace that sometimes annoys me. I know that the payoff is coming, so I have to remind myself to be patient and enjoy this often fascinating ride. 

The last third of this film is the best. As I said, it builds slowly, but it always keeps you interested. The score is also very good - I am listening to it as I type this. One of the main feelings I had throughout this film was that of John Carpenter's Starman - which is a good thing. Overall, a great sci-fi mystery thriller. The emphasis here is definitely on the characters and their journey - which is a nice change of pace. 

4/5